Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t buy bullshit

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Are narcissists happy people generally?

I see through liars

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Why do men like to have sex with a woman's ass?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

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I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have a reading level above third grade

There's no way Republican Trump won all seven swing states. How was he able to cheat and steal the election?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

When was the first time you felt discriminated against because you were female?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I actually pay taxes

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Why do very skinny girls get more male attention if it is true that men like curves?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

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I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Why do we still feel attached or jealous when a covert narcissist moves on, even after realizing their toxicity and the suffering they caused?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Why does my crush make me jealous about having a girlfriend?

I can read

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

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I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Can you share a story of someone who had a lucky experience while hitchhiking?

I can count

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Why can't I lose weight?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

My wife admitted to cheating on me with a married man. Should I tell this man and his wife that I know?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I understand how hurricane paths work

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.